Back in December 2010, as the year drew to a close, I found myself reflecting on what I had accomplished the last 12 months. I realized I had kept myself busy with a full time job outside of the home, as well as all the mothering and wife responsibilities in home. I was spending 40-45 hours a week at my job and then my "free time" doing laundry and dishes, washing bathrooms and cleaning floors. I didn't consider myself in a rut, but I wanted more out of my days.... more out of my life. My mom had brought me an article about making 12 resolutions for the new year, one for each month. They were very specific ones and while I found some of them interesting, I decided I would create my own. Since 12 seemed a little too lofty for me, I chose 5. This blog is about my attempt at completing these 5 resolutions and the revelations I had during the journey.
I had always made some kind of New Year resolution in the past and, like many people, gave up in February. This year I did a few things differently which I feel helped in my success. I made them fairly specific. For example, instead of saying "lose weight" or "get healthy", I said I would "Run a 5K". Instead of saying "Do more crafts to bring out my creative side", I chose "Knit a scarf". I tried to space out throughout the year when I would accomplish each item so that I had a timeline to guide me. I didn't necessarily realize it at the time, but later I saw how my goals were based on the SMART model (Specific, Measurable, Attainable, Realistic and Timely). I also made my resolutions public and posted them on my Facebook page so that I would have to hold myself accountable to other people who asked me about them.
Side note: I was lucky enough to attend the
Manic Mommies Escape for a weekend in November and got to listen to an inspirational talk by author and life coach Mel Robbins. I am reading her book
Stop Saying You're Fine and she gives many tips on how to get what you want out of life. From what I've read of her book so far, SMART goals are the way to go and she admits that making changes in life is not going to be easy. I told her about my resolutions for myself and she even signed my book "You're doing great! Keep it up. It's about stamina now..."
1. Run a 5K
I actually already did a few 5Ks before this year. Except I walked most of them. I had never run one start to finish. 3.1 miles does not seem like a lot, nowhere near a marathon, but for me it was a realistic goal. I had never been a runner. I thought running was boring compared to all other sports. I tried not to make excuses for myself, but having exercise-induced asthma prevented me from even trying before. Also, having a painful
neuroma in my foot was another barrier to overcome. (I describe it as a feeling of having a small pebble stuck in between your toes.)
I decided to train for the 5K by following the
Couch to 5K running program. It is a 9-week program where you alternate walking and running, gradually increasing the amount of time running and decreasing walking intervals. At first, it was very easy... only running 1-2 minutes at a time. But somewhere around week 5, you start running 20 minutes straight.
My
race was a windy Saturday morning March 12 in Naperville. I was running with my friend Brian and was cheered on by Steve, my girls and Brian's wife Becky. My first mistake of the day was that we lined up with the 8 minute miler runners and when the race started, they all sprinted past me. I knew it was going to be tough to pace myself since the only training I had done was a on treadmill which set the pace for me. Next, my music playlist got all shuffled so the songs I wanted to carry me through the last 1/2 mile were playing at the start. Oh well. I found my own rhythm and finished the race. Not anywhere near a competitive time, but my goal was to run start to finish and I had accomplished my goal.
Since then, I ran 2 more 5K races. Next year, I plan on running 7.1 miles in a marathon relay. I still don't consider myself a runner, but I do feel more energy on days I run and as an added benefit, am down to pre-baby-#1 weight.
2. Knit a scarf
The Monday after the race, I attended a knitting for beginners class at the
Knitche shop in Downers Grove. My grandmother had taught me some basics when I was young, but I hadn't picked up knitting needles since I was probably 11 years old so I had no idea how to begin. I thought about trying to teach myself through books and youtube videos, but with something that is hands-on, it makes a lot of sense to learn in person from an expert. You don't get feedback from a book or video to know if you are doing it right or wrong. It took about 2 weeks and I finished my first scarf (technically cowl). Charlotte loved modeling it for me and she wanted one of her own. So I made a smaller version for her.
And I made another one for my sister which Sydney wanted to model.
The most challenging thing I've made so far was a large cowl (knit on circular needles). I don't think I took a picture of it, but here's the
link to the pattern. It's very warm and I've seen similar ones selling for $50.
3. Meal Plan
So if I was grading myself, I would give myself a C minus for this one. Part of the problem was that it was not a SMART goal. It wasn't specific or measurable. If the goal was to meal plan more than previous years, then I accomplished it. I probably drafted a meal plan for 1 week of each month. Definitely an area that could use improving. Here's an
Organizing site that provided some motivation for me.
4. Interview my grandpa about his life
I spent a few Wednesday mornings before going to work at my grandpa's place. I asked him over 100 questions and have over 3 hours of video. I plan on editing it and giving a copy to him and our family members. I recommend EVERYONE do this. If your grandparent isn't living, interview your parents. Especially if you have kids. They will thank you later.
This was probably the easiest of my 5 resolutions to do. There was one day when my printer wasn't working so I couldn't print out my questions. Instead of canceling our "session", I took my grandpa out for lunch and we talked "off camera".
5. Start/Finish my kids baby books
Worked on this resolution today! Still need to gather up some information and try and jog my memory by looking at old photos. Definitely kicking myself for not keeping up with them while those moments were happening. I did keep a journal for both of my girls and a list of all of their first words. I also write down all of the funny things they say. Another thing we did was create an e-mail address for each of them and I send them quick e-mails about something we did on a certain day, something funny they said, a picture I took of them on my phone... something they can read when they are older.
So what did I learn from these resolutions? I don't think I learned any new lessons... I just needed to be reminded of them.
1. Life is short.
I still had the same number of hours in my day this year than in previous years. So in attempting to run, knit, meal plan, interview my grandpa and fill out baby books, I had to give up time spent doing other things. My Wednesday mornings used to be spent cleaning the house (see above) and doing errands. So it was hard sometimes to drive to my grandpa's knowing I still had piles of laundry that I would have to stay up finishing later. But sitting with him made me realize that when he is gone, I won't ever regret leaving the laundry. The present is truly a gift. Sometimes sitting with him makes me sad that I missed my chance to ask my grandma all of these same questions. Whether old or young, we don't know how much time is left and we need to take advantage of the moments spent learning and laughing together.
2. Life moves fast.
My little babies are now toddlers. It's so hard to believe that my little 6 pound 15 ounce baby is now 35 pounds and talking, jumping, reading, coloring, writing, voicing her opinions and making observations about the world. And my little baby Syd is now 2 years old and loves making everyone laugh. AMAZING!
3. We aren't getting any younger.
My knees agree with that one.
4. He who fails to plan, plans to fail.
I realized this one on the nights when I picked up the kids and had no idea what was for dinner. It's a lot of extra work to plan ahead, but in the long run, it's worth it.
5. Setting goals and accomplishing them feels good.
Being a mother at home and a manager at work is tough, sometimes thankless jobs. Both are never done for the day and both are very exhausting. Don't get me wrong, I love them both, but it was nice to do something for my own physical and mental well-being. I want to be a role-model for my children to show them the importance of setting a goal and working hard to attain it. I love it when Charlotte wears her scarf and proudly tells everyone "My mommy knitted it for me".
So you may be wondering what resolutions I have for myself for next year. I have many ideas, some a continuation of this year's (run a 10K, knit a blanket, donate scarves to the homeless) and some are completely new ideas.
However, it is with a crushed spirit that this will be my first and last post regarding my resolutions. Maybe if I had created this blog sooner and continually posted about my roadblocks and successes, I could have gained the momentum and motivation I needed. While I know I should not be looking outside of myself for affirmation or approval, it is too difficult to ignore the sting of criticism. I will strive to continue to make small changes to improve my health, family life, faith and community, but from now on, will keep those to myself. Thank you to everyone who showed interest in my resolutions and who cheered me along on my journey. This is a year I won't forget!
~Kate
